Hi I'm Marie!

Hello, my name is Marie. I decided to call this blog “he makes a way” as during summer 2020, I kept waking up with the Tasha Combs song “He makes a way” in my head. When I think about my life and where I come from, I can definitely say that God is making a way. I was molested as a child and for many years, I struggled following those events and had improper sexual habits. I did not understand what was wrong with me, I knew it was bad but I could not stop it. I also had constant nightmares and encounters that made me feel isolated and alone. I did not fit in and wanted to die. I knew God existed and from what I remember, I never doubted His existence but I just did not understand why he permitted / let so much evil in the world, why was I suffering so much, why did he create me to suffer. I did not ask to live. I was angry at God but at the same time, I knew that deep inside me he could set me free from my afflictions. I was a liar, a pervert, abusive and manipulative in my relationships. I wanted to be loved but rejected love and affection at the same time, thinking that love was constantly saying yes and allowing any kind of physical intimacy, which lead me to feel sick. I was hurting people because I was hurt, sabotaging relationships because I could not handle them. I was using divination as a means to find hope for a better tomorrow. Undoubtedly, I was choosing destructive behaviours, constantly looking for attention while hating it at the same time.

Although I was far from God, He was not far from me, he was there throughout my pain and afflictions, leading me to Him little by little, even if I felt that I was looking for the truth, something was missing in my understanding of who He was. He was the one leading me towards Him.  A decade later, here I am sharing my story of what I learned and how God made a way and is always making a way.